How important is spirituality in your life?

Still figuring it all out

Whenever I am asked if I am a spiritual or religious person, I often would just shrug off my shoulders or head and give an uncertain answer. I am Roman Catholic who admittedly does not have a very deep understanding of what it really is like to be one.

Yes, I go to church. I sometimes pray the rosary with my mom. I even attend the 9 mornings every Christmas season. I talk to a higher being before I go to sleep at night and whenever I wake up in the morning.

But I have a loooot of questions in mind. Textbooks would tell us that the concept of spirituality involves the recognition of a feeling or sense or belief that there is something greater than ourselves, something more to being human than sensory experience, and that the greater whole of which we are part is cosmic or divine in nature.

I feel that my faith, spirituality is often challenged whenever I am confronted with challenges and it makes me question so many things. I am a work in progress in trying to understand everything.

There were instances or situations in my life though, when I knew something or someone greater than me sent me these unexplainable feelings that I am loved, cared for, and blessed.

One particular moment where I felt these was that time I was in Vatican. I was travelling in Europe during the Christmas season. I was in Rome walking around when I thought of seeing the Vatican in foot. During that time, the idea of ticking off another country on my list and of course seeing Vatican is like adding feather on my cap.

So when I entered the fates of Vatican, I was happy to see the Saint Peter’s Basilica and its very impressive dome. Later on I learned that the Vatican Palace which is also within the city walla, is actually the residence of the pope. I was just casually taking photos within the grounds of St. Peter’s Square when the sound for the Angelus was heard. People started gathering and moments later, THE POPE FRANCIS showed up from one window.

I found myself starstruck, silent but smiling and later on, unknowingly, shedding a tear or two while listening to the prayer led by the Pope. It was in Italian and I don’t understand a thing but it felt like I was being blessed by some Divine Intervention. I don’t know exactly how to describe the experience…. Maybe I can call it surreal. Or a form of awakening or rediscovering something in me that made me realize how blessed I have been all these years I was thinking I have been forgotten by my God.

Whatever it is, that day.. that morning in St. Peter’s Square in Vatican made me realize to be more grateful and be kore mindful with the things and the experience I have. Of course, I still experience a lot of days questioning why certain things happen in my life up to this day, but I would always go back to that brief, unexpected encounter with the Pope and I’d feel much better.